You Know You're Getting Old When...

• The cake & ice cream gives you a hangover.


• You get presents that you can't identify. What is this?


• You get a rejection slip from Poetry magazine


• You get a call from the giver of the unidenitfied gift and have to say, "Thanks for the prezzie. It's gorgeous. What is it?" and then have the gift giver say "I don't know. I was hoping you could figure it out. You're unemployed."


• Oh yeah--I'm now a year older and still unemployed.


• Your Mom's gift is a trip to the Zoo :-)(On Lemur Day, no less)While pushing your Mom in a wheelchair, you force your Mom to go to the Children's Zoo, despite her rather loud protests, only to discover it's under construction. So you wind up holding a Which Animal Has the Cutest Butt contest. The winner was the agouti (pictured), a relative of the guinea pig, which is world renowned for it's cute butt-age.


• You forgive Peter Gabriel for not sending a B-day gift THIS year, either.


• You suddenly realize, through the pain of the cake hangover and yet another rejection notice, that Peter Gabriel now looks remarkably like a hamster